Friday, December 30, 2011

Imagine No Religion

Yes, of course we will always find something to fight about. We are animals, it's in our nature. But I'd rather fight about something that exists, than kill each other over something that cannot be proven. Religion is forever tainted, and drives people to think they are exempt from the law and free of judgement, and that is its ultimate flaw. It adds in an invisible and currently unprovable variable. A variable that attempts to make itself guilt free, question free, and perfect. I know it's hard to be free of religion, it's a wonderful crutch. I would love to know my purpose in this world, in this universe, etc, but I don't know, and I can accept that. It takes confidence, and the ability to let go of our utmost selfishness, to realize that our part in this unexplainable universe is inconsequential. What we do with our time is our choice, and we can have a good or bad impact on our small little planet. The problem with "religion" is it doesn't allow change, because it claims itself to be 'perfect', therefore holding itself exempt from any progressive change, and condemning itself to a certain and final end.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Friday, December 16, 2011


We Atheists lost a great role model today. It will be hard to find someone to match his intelligence, wit, and honesty. I'm not a fan of the "rest in peace" phrase since it is far over-used. What I do hope is that the world can take a moment to reflect on man who went to his death without having an organized panic about it, which is what religion really is (according to Dylan Moran anywho).

And to the 'fundies' who are gleefully rejoicing in his supposed placement in the mythological 'hell', I give you this.

What could be worse than Hell?  A Heaven filled with Christians...

                                                                                                                         1949 - 2011

Monday, December 5, 2011

Mermaid Bus

Saw this on the Shaytards vlog the other day, when Shay and Katilette were pulling into LAX for their flight to FL for the CTFxC royal YouTube wedding of the year (congrats Alli and Charles!)

But seriously though, can I have this bus?

Thursday, December 1, 2011

How to (hopefully) delete your facebook!

One of the Atheists I follow posted this on their blog the other day, thankfully it is EXACTLY what I had been searching for! So as we all know, facebook doesn't let you delete your account, you can only deactivate it. But thanks to this helpful link, you might actually be able to delete it. I don't know if this is just another scam by Zuckerberg, but if it is real, I am one happy girl. Go ahead and give it a try!

Many MANY thanks to The Ex-Christadelphian for this link!
Check out his blog, it's great :)

Thursday, November 17, 2011


My posting has definitely come down to all time low. I really have had no motivation to do anything productive. Nannying has been a bust, and I give up. It's not worth it, and I'm tired of getting hurt by Connecticut people, I had enough of that in college thank you very much. I'm depressed and lonely, and need a job desperately, but I don't feel like working or doing the work to even get one. Yes, you, economic depression, you have defeated me for now. But one thing you haven't taken from me, is my ability to find my own hopes and dreams. I went up to my high school two weeks ago, and although I did NOT have a good time while I was a student there, I DID have a wonderful time visiting. The school has changed so much for the better, and I am so proud of how well they are treating their students now. Yes, it's a private school, so it's always going to be partially about the money, but they really are focusing on the students. One thing that has always helped me with other people, is my ability to relate. I'm a pretty moderate person, although any religious person wouldn't argue otherwise. This moderation helps me coast through the middle of life happily. I have my ups and downs like every other person don't get me wrong (definitely in a down right now), but I find myself pretty middle of the road these days. With this stability I have brought about in my life, I have found what I want to do with my future. I want to work with adolescents, at a private school. Preferably at my alma mater, but that's not a guarantee. I want to be a counselor or instructional support. To be able to provide the help and support that I was so lucky to have found in a few wonderful individuals at my high school. I know it's because of them that I've reached this point in my life, and that I wouldn't have made it without their hard work and support. I want to provide that for students, to be there for them in such a critical part of their lives. So yes, that is my dream, now if only I could find some confidence and a job to get me into a program to work my way towards my dream. Of course confidence and a job are hard to find these days, but hopefully I can get myself "un-depressed" and motivated enough to get some confidence. Let's hope I can!

Monday, October 31, 2011

October 2011 Snowstorm

Yeah.... See all that black, we're right in the middle of that. That black means 81-100% power outages, and it's updated every 15 minutes. So yeah, we fled to NH to get heat and water. Super fun!

Thursday, October 13, 2011

"Work Smarter, Not Harder"

So since moving in, we've had to downsize considerably (only two closets in the whole apartment), but it really has been great. Nothing like waking up and watching The Tonight Show clips and eating gummi bears for breakfast, well that was just today, but still. So I have interview. Yeah. I'm excited, and not. It's a job, so I'll do it. The shift is graveyard, 3-9am, but that kind of fits me. I just won't be able to see the boy as much :(  I'm hoping something library related opens up, hint hint perhaps the NCCC library that I can see out my window.... but in the meanwhile, it would be nice to pay my own rent, perhaps put something aside.
I'm really glad I deleted facebook, it's kind of like an addictive substance for me, since I am so dependent on peoples reactions and what they think of me. The issue I had with facebook, is that I cared to much. When two people (whom I thought were friends), who still go to Keene, deleted me, one blocked me, and the other blocked me when I messaged her asking what I did and saying that I was sorry for whatever "it" was, I was really upset. I cried for a month, started sleeping till 6pm, and barely got out of bed, let alone the apt. This all sounds ridiculous, and overly dramatic, which it was, but I couldn't help it. As usual, I put too much stock in my friendships. With the majority of people on that stupid social networking site, when I added them as a friend, I meant it. I am not a fair-weather friend. I will literally do whatever it takes to make things alright, and to be there for them. To the few who appreciate it, mainly a suite mate of mine from Keene, I have formed incredible friendships, ones that I can see having all of my life, and am incredibly grateful for.
I mean, in the end, this really is my own fault, because I walked right through the warning signs, and as always, the only person hurt is me. And yes, perhaps they were "cleaning house", but is it so damn hard to admit it? Here I am thinking I did something wrong, and wanting to change it. I always want to learn, and grow, and if I make mistakes, I try not to repeat them, as a good friend has said to me, "Work smarter, not harder".
That's why I acknowledge that facebook is a poisonous environment for someone like me, because I don't do this pretend stuff. I have tried, I try to keep up and be mean girl, but I suck at it. I have too many other issues to deal with. I wear my heart on my sleeve, it gets me in trouble, it pushes people away from me, but it's who I am, and not only am I okay with it, I love that part about me. I'm not afraid to hash it out for the better, I can fight, and in the end, if need be, I can throw out psychological punches faster and better than most, because it's what I've been trained to do (I didn't spend three torturous years in boarding school doing nothing). We're all bad guys, we're all good guys, we're all human, and we screw up constantly. As I grow up, and since I've left college, all I've done with my life, is throw off the mask, and unscrew the social norms that have been placed all over me. I'm me again, or closer to me than I've ever been. And I'm happier by the day.

Monday, October 10, 2011


You will have this stuck in your head for the rest of the week, enjoy! :)

Saturday, October 8, 2011


I did it! I deleted my facebook! No longer am I a slave to the social mess of facebook. Now I just have to keep away from it. But I think it'll be pretty easy, drama vs no drama which would you pick?

Friday, September 23, 2011


Hello All!

So big things happening in smelleticut!
We are moving!
After being subjected to second hand smoke from our neighbors for four months, and us having a pretty severe reaction to it, we are packing up and moving out. We were able to break our lease, which is really hard to do, but they are playing nice so far, so lets hope! We're move out into the middle of nowhere CT, exactly where we wanted to go, and to a non-smoking building. Yay!

In other news, after being subjected to another round of Facebook drama, I've decided it's time to get out of that trap. I'm sick of being a part of a website where I've never seen more adults act like children, and where people hide behind virtual walls stalking each other, and treating people in such abhorrent ways that they would NEVER have enough guts to do in person. I've done it, and I've been ashamed of myself for it. Although, unlike most people, the things I post on FB, and things I say on FB, are things I actually say in person. I am not afraid to confront people, it's not my favorite thing to do, but I'll do it. Another common misconception is that I specifically put up controversial media to irritate others and start fights, which is so far from the truth that it is almost hysterical. I put up things, on MY facebook, that I am interested in. I share it, on MY wall, for MY friends that share similar interests. If you're my friend and you don't have similar interests, here's a thought, DON'T look at it. I'm allowed to have my opinions, and if that's what I use my social media for, than deal with it or don't waste my time. Since people have found that impossible to do, and continue to act this way, I've figured it's time to cut the poison out. I don't need to have people who I thought were friends deciding to cut me out without an explanation. How about the people who really want to keep in touch with me, keep in touch with me the old fashioned way. Yeah, old fashioned meaning emails, letters, calls, and texting.

I came to this resolute decision after having a great talk with a great friend. He really helped me shift back into a good mindset. I've been really hurting lately, and have had a skewed perspective, and I was not treating myself well at all. I deserve more than this in life, and I am going to get it. I am going to be the person I am, and the person I want to become, and be happy with my past and present. Although I am already happy with my past. I have no regrets, so I am already half way there.

So anyways, the move will occupy quite a bit of time, but once we move in, I am deleting FB, changing my eating habits, not sleeping all day, and getting back to nature and what is real. Eventually I will put up that post on religion, but for right now, I need the anger out of my life for a bit. I'm thinking of doing a video, it's much easier to talk, but we'll see.

Monday, August 22, 2011

The Start of the Long Awaited Posts

Let's talk. And let's be frank. I have had quite a few people ask me why I haven't put up a religion post yet, and the reason is pretty simple. The past few weeks I have been attempting to get a job in the Hartford, CT area, which in this job market is laughable for sure. I also have had the unfortunate circumstance of having to weekly battle religion with a former friend, exhausting the topic for me. Now that my mind is clear, and said person removed from my life, I am free to return to my Atheist ways in peace. So here is a forward to the religion post to come.

When I talk about religion, most people stop listening because I am extremely blunt about it, and must people listening are religious themselves. I have unfortunately been surrounded by too many suffocating religious people in my life, and since I have burst forth from this sheltering and judgmental cocoon of "God", I have found my voice against the atrocities and lack of morals produced by religion. Yes, that is right, lack of morals. Because this voice I have discovered is loud, and proud, it is quick to be sheltered and shunned, and is automatically classified as extreme. In fact, my thoughts are not extreme, they are just in opposition of the favored position. It should also be taken into account that said favored position has extreme emotional ties to those who hold it, leading them to be extremely irrational in defense of it. It should also be noted that these people are very frequently ones who have based their whole entire lives off their chosen religion, and psychologically depend on it as a pillar of their existence, which makes questioning it even harder for them.

This post I will be writing will be blunt, factual, and unemotional. For me it is basic fact. I go by what the facts tell me, and the facts and evidence (at the present time) lead to the conclusion of it to be highly more likely of there NOT being a divine being, then there being one. In fact, they do not support there being a divine being at all. Sorry, but an all encompassing, and very commonly self-manifested, "feeling inside" that religious people so often look towards as evidence as proof, is in fact not proof at all. As an anxious person who can occasionally be prone to self-inflicted panic attacks (not on purpose of course), I can accurately say that one CAN manifest a feeling so strongly in themselves without it being based off of any fact or reason. I have found, with said panic attacks, the inspiration that lead me to panic was in fact my own misinterpretation of the facts. Please note, I gave this personal example to promote an understanding between us that I am one to do my own research, and go off of my own experiences combined with research, and that I do not form my opinions based solely off of Google searches, college psychology classes, and my purported "hatred" of people, which was the assumption by the former friend I mentioned above, who will most likely be reading this post. 

The last thing I would like to clear up, before I bring this post to and end, is that although I have a hatred for religion, I do NOT have a hatred for people. Among other things, I consider myself a humanist, despite the general discourse between Humanism and "Militant" Atheism/Anti-theism, I know that both can work together in harmony. It is my humanist morals, and the affection that I have for ALL creatures in the universe, the push me to Anti-theism. I do not truly believe, I know that it is possible for humans to possess morals without religion, and I know that religion is actually more harmful than good. In fact, what good it does offer is almost always tainted with the insistence of judgement of others who do not follow said religion, and the pending admission to heaven.

So, fasten your seat-belts, clutch your sacred texts, and be prepared for my honest opinion, no holds barred, no restrictions.

This WILL be a verbal attack on most of your religions. 

Monday, July 4, 2011

The New Life?

So since moving down to Connecticut, I have been extremely busy doing nothing with my life, it's a tough job! No really though, could someone hire me? Please? Yeah. It's come to that. I really don't want to do retail, but even they aren't calling me back. The library job, the library technician job, the one where you only needed some library experience, not even a bachelors, had over 100 applicants. At least half of them having an MLS. So I obviously didn't hear back from that job. Although the test the administered for the second round was absolutely ridiculous, I still really wanted that job. My mom knows of someone whose son is going to UNH in the fall for his freshman year, and during orientation, one of the students said that 80% of the recent graduates from our year had to move back home with their parents. That sucks. I know I am incredibly lucky to be living in my own apartment with my boyfriend, truly it's wonderful, but I'm ready to do something. I'm tired of leeching off my parents, I want my own income! This job market sucks. I'm not going to point fingers and blame, at least not right now, but trying to find a job these days, ANY job, is crazy. It's like I might as well not have a Bachelors degree, especially since I got it in the most useless subject ever, Psychology. Well I'm going to taper off my rant, but I know, I KNOW the majority of those who graduated from college in the past few years, have most likely felt this, and are probably still dealing with this. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll get back to the grand NOTHING I was doing...

Monday, June 13, 2011


So here is a poem about the Holocaust I wrote a long time ago, I think in high school? Anyways, at least it's something.


Fly Jews, Fly
get away from this place,
you are a nationality and religion,

through fire,
through hell

Warsaw Ghetto

blue star,
white band

you could say forgotten,
but that is a wish,
targets are not forgotten


smite off the face of the earth
by god?

by ourselves

there is no difference,
humans are humans,
and we destroy each other

so fly,
fly away people,
true of heart,

and live.

Friday, May 27, 2011

To the Tea Party... borrowed :)

The actual author is unknown but he/she speaks volumes
You didn’t get mad when the Supreme Court stopped a legal recount and appointed a President.

You didn’t get mad when Cheney allowed Energy company officials to dictate Energy policy and push us to invade Iraq .

You didn’t get mad when a covert CIA operative got outed.

You didn’t get mad when the Patriot Act got passed.

You didn’t get mad when we illegally invaded a country that  posed no threat to us.   
You didn’t get mad when we spent over 800 billion (and counting) on said illegal war.
You didn’t get mad when Bush borrowed more money from foreign sources than the previous 42 Presidents combined.

You didn’t get mad when over 10 billion dollars in cash just disappeared in Iraq .

You didn’t get mad when you found out we were torturing people.

You didn’t get mad when Bush embraced trade and outsourcing policies that shipped 6 million American jobs out of the country.

You didn’t get mad when the government was illegally wiretapping Americans.

You didn’t get mad when we didn’t catch Bin Laden.

You didn’t get mad when Bush rang up 10 trillion dollars in combined budget and current account deficits.

You didn’t get mad when you saw the horrible conditions at  Walter Reed.

You didn’t get mad when we let a major US city, New Orleans, drown.

You didn’t get mad when we gave people who had more money than they could spend, the filthy rich, over a trillion dollars in taxbreaks. 
You didn’t get mad with the worst 8 years of job creations in several decades.

You didn’t get mad when over 200,000 US Citizens lost their lives because they had no health insurance.

You didn’t get mad when lack of oversight and regulations from the Bush Administration caused US Citizens to lose 12 trillion dollars in investments, retirement, and home values.

No…..You finally got mad

When a black man was elected President and decided that people in America deserved the right to see a doctor if they are sick.

Monday, May 16, 2011


This one is for my generation.

I recently graduated from college, and have found the pressure overwhelming. What pressure you ask? As most would assume, the normal pressures of leaping from the nest into the world are at play. But I'm starting to feel, and I hope I'm not alone in this, that the pressures we face today as the next leaders of the world are much bigger and heavier than those of our parents. Even as little as 40, 50, 60 years ago, the world was not as connected as it is today. We are in the age of information and technology, and as the web of information grows bigger, the more aware we become. We are constantly bombarded, and our focus can shift from continent to continent at a moments notice. With all of this technology, most of it really becoming influential in the past 15 years, we are now aware of so many things, for example, how much damage has been done to our planet, the fact that there is an AIDS and HIV epidemic in Africa, that slave labor is rampant in Asia, etc. For most of our parents, they saw themselves as leaders of America, leaders of their small little sections, leaders of their families and ancestors. But for us, I feel, we are to be leaders of the world. I cannot live under a rock anymore, I have no choice. Our planet is in severe jeopardy, in many different ways, and the smarter and more advanced we get, the more responsibility there is. As said by Francis Bacon, "Knowledge is power", but as Stan Lee says, "With great power, comes great responsibility". This is the pressure I feel, even just as a mere recent college graduate, with a degree in Psych that really can't take me anywhere far, I feel the pressure to do my part in this world, and help it, whatever that help may be. Hopefully I made some sense in this little paragraph, and hopefully I'm not alone.

As always, I welcome discussion, and have made it so people can post anonymously below and can also comment without having an account. Thanks for reading :)

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Blog One

Here is my blog. Probably ill-advised, bet definitely well intentioned. The goal? To help. I simply want to help the world, and be a part of it. I will probably say controversial things, and talk about uncomfortable topics, but it's time for us to rip off our band-aid and dive in, so, here I go.